A few weeks ago I was asked to take part in a blog series called “Divas Wanna Know” by @Jendiva of Mind of a Diva a great blog for women full of empowering posts that encourage women to redefine what it means to be a Diva. This is part II of questions that women wanted to ask men in a frank and honest way. I re-posted my answers here. I’m curious, what questions would you have asked? Leave your thoughts in the comments below.
1. Do you see your ideal woman being introverted or extroverted?
I always saw myself with someone who was more extroverted because I’m like that but I discovered the woman who I fell in love with is introverted and I found that I’m more suited with that type.
Why do you like that type?
I like her type because of all the things I’ve learned from her. She’s more of an observer, notices a lot of the details because she’s not talking as much. So I’ve learned to be more balanced…observing as much as I speak and because of that it’s made me a wiser more insightful person.
2. What qualities do you admire most about a women and why?
I admire her emotional intelligence, her ability to empathize. I also admire her internal strength and her ability to do any and everything.
What do you like the least?
I really don’t like the pettiness and cattiness some women display.
3. When did you consider yourself to be emotionally secure to be comfortable with yourself ?
It was a process. By the time I was in my late 20′s I was pretty comfortable with the person that I had become. Although I must admit there were things that I learned and got better at as I got older.
4. For guys is it necessary that a woman have her own professional success?
Not necessarily, as long as she’s providing for herself and accomplishing her purpose and passion.
5. Why do you believe that some women mistake a man being nice to them as flirting?
“She’s immune to Chivalry, Distracted by Game, Never had the former, So she thinks they’re the same.”
Basically some women mistake “niceness” for Game. They are used to guys wanting something from them. Because most guys use game to get what they want its difficult to distinguish that from true heartfelt chivalry.
6. Do you compare your mate to your mother? Consciously or subconsciously..
7. How do guys decide if they are dealing with a woman who is a keeper versus a woman they can just have “fun” with?
I was never a guy who just wanted to have “fun” with a woman. I knew the difference between friendship, dating, and courtship. I didn’t date till I was ready to be in a relationship so I always discussed boundaries. I dated with purpose and found the person I was meant to be with quicker.
8. Are men bothered by their girl talking to her friends about their relationship?
Yes. Most of us are bothered by it. I know I make it a habit not to discuss intimate details of my relationship with anyone, not even my parents. We understand that you like “girl talk”, but there’s a line that you should stay within. General things like personal preferences, favorite things etc.
Are there topics that shouldn’t be discussed?
Yes. Conflicts or disagreements, sex and money should never be discussed with anyone outside the relationship because it only leads to more conflicts.